The roller coaster of change...

I have never blogged before so you will have to bear with me.

I unfortunately or fortunately can not speak of my exciting ventures into Vet med yet as I am still desperately ambling through the trenches of the job search. I can however speak of the emotional state that me and I believe most of my classmates are experiencing at this time. Jobful or jobless, we are all in a great place of change. After 4 years of intricately placing everything in its rightful place in the dollhouse of our brains, it is as if someone has lifted our delicately designed domicile, violently shaken it and dumped its contents upon the floor. Those of us who don't have work, at least myself, feel lost anxious, and can't quite figure out what to do with all of the time that is now afforded to us. It feels wrong, almost evil. As we anxiously hope for acceptance and validation through a job offer, we jealously look at those with jobs. On the other hand those with jobs, experience any number of new horrors. Some look at those jobless, who have time and leisure and envy the space to collect oneself. Others dread the world to which they have committed themselves, assuming the worst, and wish they could go back and choose all over again. Others yet begin the job joyfully and hopefully, only to experience that dreaded moment, that none of us are prepared for, that you are inherently unprepared for. The moment when you just don't succeed. Whether it be, not knowing the diagnosis, not knowing the treatment, not have the technical skills needed, or frankly just not feeling like it went they way it was supposed to.

To say the least where ever we are, what ever we are doing, this time is wrought with emotion. One moment the joy of having the career that we all worked so hard to achieve or having the time to appreciate the work completed. The next moment a puddle of tears and possibly hysteria if you are anything like me because of the sense that there is no way you can ever live up to the challenges ahead of you or the fear that no one will ever want to hire you.

I feel sufficiently purged of all thoughts floating through my head at this moment. I send wishes of calmness and moments of centeredness to all my compatriots where ever you are, what ever you are doing.